The ancient Greeks had four different words for love, and pastor Gary Chapman popularised the concept of five ‘love languages’ — a framework that helps us understand how we feel, express, and show love. (If you’ve never looked them up, I highly recommend it! They can lead to some real ‘aha’ moments about why communication with partners, family, or colleagues sometimes misses the mark.)

For all the ways we talk about love, the church has often been distracted, and almost obsessed, with sex, as if that were the whole story. But love is so much bigger. In fact, I suspect that love is the entry point into inclusion for many of us. When something happens to someone we love, we understand it differently. Love transforms us — inside and out. Every area of inclusion makes more sense when we look at it through the lens of love.

So this month, let’s articulate and celebrate love a little louder.

Alright, luv?

With my thanks to all those who took the time to share their stories and reflections for this edition.

We know this may feel frustrating — especially for those who have been eager to formalise their connection — but this step is essential to making the process clearer and more sustainable. This pause allows us to build a system that can keep up with this growth, making it easier for more people to join and ensuring that our network remains strong and connected.

We appreciate your patience and look forward to welcoming new members once the updated process is in place!

You can still sign up to the mailing list and access the resources on the website in the meantime.

In the meantime, our website is still full of resources and suggestions to help you and your community review and improve the accessibility, inclusivity and diversity of the welcome you are able to offer.

Next month, as Lent begins, we will be offering the remaining stock of our six original Inclusive Book series at a reduced price. So watch this space for that and consider if you might like to add to your library!

As the world faces growing challenges, the church is being called to a deeper, more authentic engagement with the voices that shape its future. This one day conference will bring together Christians from diverse backgrounds to explore the essential role of prophecy within the church today. The event will address pressing questions: What is a prophet? What is prophecy? Where are these voices being spoken today? And how can we, as a church, recognize and respond to these prophetic calls?

The title of the conference, Our Wound is Our Word, reflects the idea that many of those who have experienced marginalisation possess a powerful, unique voice that can speak to the wider church. It is a call for the church to listen to those on the edges and recognise how their stories can lead to healing and transformation for the wider body of Christ.

To listen to the prophetic voice of Inclusivity as we call to create a diverse, accessible and transformative church.

Keynote Speakers: Rabbi Elisheva Salamo, Revd Azariah France-Williams and Revd Chris Howson

Workshops will be led by renowned thinkers and leaders in the church, including: Revd Sharon Moughtin, Revd Chantal Noppen, Professor C L Nash, Dr Lauren Stanley, Rt Revd Dr John Inge, Revd Georgia Ashwell and Revd Grey Collier

Practical Information:

• Tickets: £33/£12 concessions, including lunch
• Support for travel costs and overnight accommodation in St John's crypt is available upon request
• Access information and travel details for St John’s Church are available on AccessAble
• British Sign Language (BSL) interpretation will be available in plenary sessions and one workshop. Please contact us in advance if you require BSL interpretation.
• For more information or specific accessibility requests, please email: admin@stjohnswaterloo.org

For further details and to book, visit
https://stjohnswaterloo.org/event/generous-faith-our-wound-is-our-word/

For media inquiries, please contact Chantal Noppen:: natco@inclusive-church.org 07734 809327‬‬

We have Regional Ambassadors who support the work of Inclusive Church in their local area, more info on them and the regions is on the IC website. 

You can see on the website where we currently have reps. We will be actively looking to grow the RA team very soon so if you think you’d like to know more about what being a Regional Ambassador involves, please get in touch!

This month we're hearing from two of our RAs, Ruth and Jacqui.

Ruth is also one of the Inclusive Church Regional Ambassadors for
London, and would love to hear from you if you’d like to connect up.

Read more here: https://www.inclusive-church.org/2025/02/05/deacon-hearted/

He doesn’t go every week but when he’s not there someone always asks where he is. He has a lot of friends in the congregation. He’s very sensitive to moods and emotions. Recently when a colleague suffered a close family bereavement my son took him to one side and prayed with him because he could see what was needed.

Before the pandemic he was licensed and served as a server and crucifer.

I can tell you all that about my son and his life without needing to mention that he has the extra chromosome which causes Down's Syndrome. He looks a bit different; he sounds a bit different. He has an associated learning disability. But everything I’ve already written about him as a man tells you more about him than the fact of his extra chromosome which may inform his life but certainly doesn’t define it. Or him.

Let me share his take on the Eucharist: ‘The Bread & Wine makes us think about Jesus, and God loves everybody, and I’m part of all that when I have bread & wine like everybody else’

Beat that for a description of full inclusion.

— Jacqui & Brent Tyson

• World Down Syndrome Day is celebrated on 21 March: https://www.worlddownsyndromeday.org/

There was homemade dandelion oil available and used for anointing in the Prayer Den and sticks to weave with coloured wool. They’re a young diverse community, made up of members from a wide variety of backgrounds and church experiences. Folk who have found themselves in the woods, literally, on their search to grow closer to God, committed to exploring and discerning what church is meant to look like for them and creating it together. And joining Inclusive Church might be part of that journey for them…

Magdalene is led by the Rev'd Rachael Phillips a pioneer curate in the Diocese of Durham. Funded and supported by the Church of England.

We want members of IC to have the opportunity to share joyful stories and encouraging signs of progress with each other. There is always more to celebrate than we realise!

Here's a round-up of recent events and happenings.

We'd love to celebrate with you, so do send us your stories.

This is where I came in, and I began my role in November 2024. I’m employed to work one day a week and am delighted that the Diocese is resourcing this work. Much of my time at the moment is spent in consultation to make sure we get the aims and governance of the Chaplaincy correct. Some of the senior staff are closely involved in the project to make sure that the work of the Chaplaincy is integrated into the work of the Diocese as a whole. I am also spending time with those who have already come forward for pastoral support, and we are preparing to recruit a team of Volunteer Chaplains.

The aims of the Chaplaincy include providing pastoral support for LGBTQI+ people in the Diocese and their friends and loved ones, and also assisting and advising parishes who want to become more inclusive of LGBTQI+ people. I’ve been bowled over by the enthusiasm with which the post has been greeted; it seems that for some people even the creation of the Chaplaincy has helped them to feel more seen and secure. This is fabulous, but the work has just begun and we have plenty more to achieve! If you are in Newcastle and would like to get involved or have a conversation, please get in touch with me on e.duff@newcastle.anglican.org

Rev’d Emma Duff, Lead LGBTQI+ Chaplain, Diocese of Newcastle.

words were not enough, we need to seek ways of making them a reality.

In 2024, St Mary’s Todmorden celebrated two exciting milestones: its first baptism for the child of a lesbian couple and its first same-sex commitment blessing using the Prayers of Love and Faith. These joyful moments reflect the parish's commitment to inclusion, love in action, and the transformative power of faith.

Read more from their vicar here: https://www.inclusive-church.org/2025/02/10/a-
celebration-of-love-whats-not-to-like/

Catherine is secretary of NADAWM (the National Association for
Diocesan Advisors in Women’s Ministry) and has recently been elected to General Synod.

Among these celebrations, the blessing service for Gerry and Jazz stands out as a vivid testament to St Mary’s welcoming community and its dedication to affirming LGBTQ+ relationships within the Church.

The December celebration honoured Gerry and Jazz, a couple deeply rooted in the congregation, with a beautiful, bespoke service following their legal wedding. Filled with music, theatrical flair, and family traditions, the event celebrated their love and unity while embodying the vibrant diversity of St Mary’s community.

For Gerry and Jazz, their journey to this day carried both joy and pain. When Gerry and Jazz married at Halifax registry office, the ceremony was “a stark and quick affair... more of a clerical exercise than a celebration.” But in the service using the prayers of Love and Faith that followed, their love was declared before God and their church family. They crafted a sacred space, filled with candles, music, and the involvement of loved ones, making it “a true celebration of love and acceptance.”

Gerry reflects on the hypocrisy of a Church that welcomes non-believers for marriage but excludes faithful LGBTQ+ Christians: “If Jesus was alive today, a man who welcomed those on the edge of society, he’d be furious at such behaviour.” Jazz adds: “I feel like the Church has lost its way... adhering to the wishes of a small minority, rather than standing by the majority.”

For many LGBTQ+ Christians, navigating their faith within a church that still excludes same-sex marriage can feel like walking a tightrope — balancing love and belief against institutional rejection. Yet, stories like Gerry and Jazz’s remind us of the power of love, faith, and community to transcend these barriers.

Their blessing was not just a ceremony but a testament to their resilience, a symbol of hope, and a call for the Church to do better.

Read more about Gerry and Jazz’s blessing service and their story here: https://www.inclusive-church.org/2025/02/10/jesus-would-let-the-band-play-on/

• This echoes the wider conversation happening across the Church, as individuals and congregations work towards making inclusion not just an aspiration but a lived reality. Whether it’s embracing the gifts LGBTQ+ people bring to the Church, advocating for change, or celebrating love in all its forms, the work continues. Nothing is impossible when love leads the way, keep up the good work St Mary’s Todmorden, and thank you for sharing a snapshot of your story with us!

  Image by Emma Major: mum, wife, poet, artist, blind wheelchair driver, pioneer minister, author at LLMCalling.com

• Below is a poem from Rev’d Tom Willis, an IC member and trans priest in Oxford Diocese. Reflecting on his journey and the finding of his name and identity. It is shared with his permission.

My name is Tom - Thomas
And my pronouns are he / him, or
if you prefer, they / them.
Please don’t abuse my trust.
If you are reading this poem you are among the first to meet me -
among the first to know me by name.
Why Thomas? Why Tom?
Because it is my name.
And, if God truly is omniscient, all-loving and almighty -
the God who calls us by name - then God has known me by name -
God has called me by name -

since before I was even born.
And God doesn’t make mistakes.
I am wonderfully made in the image of
the three-personed God who goes by many names.
But who is, and will always be,
my Lord and my God.
I know some of you will say that I am being reckless.
Yup - that’s me.
I am the one who said, “Let us also go that we may die with him.”
I’m bold and courageous or, perhaps, just plain stupid.
(Though someone once told me that I must not put myself down.)
I will follow Jesus though I do not know where he is going,
So how can I know the way?
I am the one who - when the others cowered in the upper room -
dared to be different.
Dared to venture out into the dark, dangerous streets of Jerusalem.
Maybe, I didn’t really doubt.
Maybe, I was just p****d off at the posturing of the others,
who bragged that they had seen the Lord.
But I am the one he called to greater intimacy.
I am the one to whom he said, “thrust your hand into my side.
Do not doubt but believe.”
Did I do so?
Did my hand slide into his side and caress his innermost parts?
Perhaps that will remain our secret.
Did my hands take his wounded hands in mine,
and did my fingers trace the scars left by those cruel nails?
Did my lips tenderly kiss those scars?
Perhaps that will remain our secret.
But I was the first to declare him
“My Lord and my God,”
and that shall never be taken from me.
Tread gently for this is holy ground.
You are among the first to know the name
by which God called me before I was even born.
You are among the first to know the name
by which God called me when he
knit me together within my mother’s womb.
You are among the first to know the name by which
God called me when he whispered gently -
in the sound of silence -
“Thomas… Tom, my precious, precious child,
do not be afraid for I have redeemed you.
I have called you by name, you are mine.”
My name is Tom - Thomas.
And my pronouns are he/him.
Tom for the Tomboy who grew up too soon
and lost his identity somewhere along the way.
Tom for the chimney sweep who found his wings and learned to swim
among the water babies and to do as he would be done by.
Tom for Tom Sawyer friend of Huckleberry Finn.
My name is Tom - Thomas and my pronouns are he / him, or
if you prefer, they / them
but for now in too many places
I must go by the name of Karen.
The name which my mum chose for me when she was told
I was another girl.
My name is Tom – Thomas and my pronouns are he / him, or
if you prefer they / them.
You may call me by name in private.
Please call me by name in your prayers.
But do not abuse my trust.
Or I shall haunt your dreams like a hound of heaven.
For I am no longer
Karen.

(Tom Wallis, June 2024 - not to be reproduced, or shared, without permission).

Join the launch of Together in London diocese, on Saturday 1 March 10am – 1pm at the Swiss Church, 79 Endell Street WC2H 9DY.

Speakers include: Nic Tall, Charlie Bell and IC trustee, Fiona MacMillan.

Come and learn more about what' happening at General Synod and how you can get involved. Hear ideas, share stories and help to build the Together in London network. Be part of changing the future of inclusion in the Diocese of London and across the Church of England.

Details and registration: https://TogetherLondonLaunch.eventbrite.co.uk

Together for the Church of England aims to support and work with all those desiring a more diverse and loving Church of England. We hope for full inclusion and equality. We seek to challenge discrimination and encourage involvement in the governance of the Church of England at all levels. Together in London diocese network is a space for people who share these values.

On 30 January, Helen King, Evie Vernon O’Brien and Rachel Mann joined Alison Webster for an panel discussion on the topic of ‘Immaculate Forms: we need to talk about bodies’. The podcast recording is available to watch back on Modern Church’s YouTube
channel here: https://www.youtube.com/live/WausQnufywA

Please subscribe if you’d like to hear future conversations and lectures.

Eager to learn how your local community can transform communities all around the world?

Be a changemaker for love, equality, dignity and justice by coming to our Changemakers Conference. Join Christian Aid’s annual supporter event — held on Saturday 8 March 2025 from 10.30am to 1pm, with additional workshops at St John's from 2pm to 4pm.

• We have an amazing programme (10.30am-1pm) to inspire you,
  including:
• Stories of hope from a Programme Officer and Partner from
  Guatemala.
• Fundraising resources for Christian Aid Week 2025.
• Updates from our humanitarian team on our ongoing response to
  global disasters, including our work in Gaza.
• Our latest campaign action for 2025.
• Reflections on 80 years of Christian Aid and what we’ve achieved
  together.

For both our main London event at St John’s Waterloo and all Regional Watch Party venues, there will be a free lunch following the event at 1pm.

There will be an afternoon of seminars and workshops between 2pm and 4pm following the main London event. These workshops have been organised in partnership with Faith for the Climate and as well as a focus on climate action, will include a more in-depth Q&A with our visitors from Guatemala.

We will be filming these sessions and making them available after the Conference for those unable to attend in London, but we unfortunately cannot live-stream them.

We are pleased to announce that on 9 April 2025, we are hosting a Bonhoeffer Memorial Event, focusing on the theme 'The Legacy of Dietrich Bonhoeffer 80 years on'. This event marks 80 years since Bonhoeffer's execution. We are honoured to be joined by Bishop Martin Lind and the Revd Dr Keith Clements, who will share in a memorial lecture and discussion. At the end of the event, there will be a memorial communion service for those who wish to participate. The event will take place both online and in person at the Emmanuel Centre (Leeds University Chaplaincy, UK), and will run from 12:30-17:30.

All the information can be found on our website (https://www.projectbonhoeffer.org.uk/events/), and you can book your place directly on Eventbrite using this link: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bonhoeffer-memorial-day-the-legacy-of-dietrich-bonhoeffer-80-years-on-tickets-1223795718939).

If you have any questions, please feel free to get in touch with Sarah Hambly, Administrator at Project Bonhoeffer // email: contact@projectbonhoeffer.org.uk // website: www.projectbonhoeffer.org.uk/

I would like to build a comms team to help with the newsletter, SM posts and website revisions. The newsletter is currently being sent out to over 2500 people every month so it’s not a small publication. But I have a much longer To Do list than Time Available!

Perhaps you could help?

If any of you feel that you might like to offer your time, skills and experience in this area I would love to hear from you! Whether it is  or proof reading, scheduling posts or generating content. I am very open to possibilities for collaboration and assistance.

My email is NatCo@inclusive-church.org

With thanks,

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The content of the newsletter is drawn from a number of sources including individuals and partner organisations. The views expressed here do not necessarily reflect a 'formal viewpoint' of the Inclusive Church trustees, individual members of Inclusive Church or registered inclusive churches.

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